Impostor syndrome and looking for an adventure

This is probably something that most developers come across at some point. I’m in little of a crisis right now with my career. I’m currently working with a company doing mostly maintenance of an ecosystem of applications I’ve been developing for them in the past 10 years (yeah, 10 years in the same company). The job is ok, salary is ok for my country, terrible for Europe or the US. I have a really flexible schedule, work load is fine, I don’t have a problem with the job itself. I could say I’m a core developer for this little company. I have the oportunity in some degree to explore new technologies but it’s not really easy to upgrade something that the company depends so much on.

Given the context, political an economic crisis in my country is pushing me to emigrate, and I’m starting to think of looking for a company abroad to sponsor me. It’s not really necesary, I have the economic means to go there as a turist and start looking for a job, but sponsoring would be great because I would have to take my family with me and I don’t really know where to go to in the first place.

The thing is that I’m starting to look at what those kind of companies ask for and I’m starting to build up an acute case of impostor syndrome where I’m begining to believe I’m a really bad developer and I could never get one of those jobs. People I know that went this path are really good developers, much better than I’m honestly. I know that companies ask for more than they’re really expecting but I get the feeling that I lack most of those skills.

I’ve been developing systems using PHP and jQuery, and recently started using Vue, so simple stuff, nothing fancy. I know server managment with Linux and AWS, enough to mount web apps, databases, load balancers, etc. English is not my first language (Spanish is), and I can comunicate good enough writing but I’m terrible at speaking, something that really worries me if I’m looking to go this route. I don’t know how to comunicate well and fluently, nothing to do with the language itself, it’s just that I don’t have experience working with other people, so I believe I perform terrible when in interviews. Last time I job an interview in English I started talking nonsense. And as far as I could see I need to be good at comunicating. Those companies ask for technologies I don’t have any experience in, they do exams I’m too dumb to complete correctly (I’ve looked at models).

So, What do you think? Is it really like this and I should prepare myself to pass 7 interviews with highly educated developers or face constant failure? I understand the only way to learn this is to experience it myself but right know I’m too worried to even start asking at recruiters. Maybe a reality check is what I need.

Any advice is welcome, and sorry if I didn’t explain myself correctly.

submitted by /u/ChispaCS
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